When I’m not being a writer and editor, I’m a mentor in a
local school. Many of the pupils I see struggle with anxiety, and in these
times, that’s all of us isn’t it?
I wanted to share a simple three-step process designed to ‘reset’
your system when anxiety takes over. It involves activity, relaxation, and thinking
of a happy memory – all things you can do under lockdown conditions!
Holiday memories
Nearly all my happy memories are of holidays. My upcoming
novel, The Year of the Ghost is about a treasured annual family holiday which
one year is the scene of a haunting. It’s a story of family: of brokenness,
secrets and love. The characters are not my family, but it is based
on our annual pilgrimage to my father’s Welsh homeland. My memories of this beautiful
place span most of my life and my happiest times. I have spent the last couple
of years immersed in them as I write.
The good news is that those memories which keep you going
through the winter can be accessed in this difficult time, and all the good
feelings they give you will bolster your spirits right now. There's a reason why people all over the world are sharing pictures of beaches!
Anxious times
I have a constant background hum of alarm, apprehension and
sadness which I put aside as I try to live this crisis one day at a time. But the
effort of powering through it tires me out. Most of the time, I'm fine, but I have bouts of low mood and over-sensitivity
that are not like the usual me.
These three steps are designed to help when anxiety becomes
overwhelming, but at the moment I’d suggest that we need them all the time!
1 Activity
When you’re worried, your heart beats
faster and your stomach feels wrong. Just becoming aware of these symptoms can
make the anxiety worse. The first step to resetting your body is to do
something active and fun: take your daily outside exercise or do something
indoors. Make sure it’s actually fun, not something you have to force yourself
to do! Dance to your favourite song, do step aerobics to music on your bottom
stairs, play table tennis on the dining room table, bounce a ball against the
wall… Changing how your body feels is a quick and effective way to start
transforming your state of mind. Now move onto the next step.
2 Relaxation
Tense all your muscles at once: make tight
fists, clench your buttocks and tighten your leg muscles, then scrunch up your
face. Count to 5 with everything clenched! Then let go, loosen, relax.
Now take a deep breath in through your nose.
Picture the air going in, down to your belly and out to every part of your body…
then breathe out slowly through your mouth. Again, let the good, cooling, balmy air in through your nose – and all the tension will flow out through your mouth.
Do this five times altogether, in and out, in and out...
3 Your happy memory
Think of a time you were happy and relaxed, perhaps
in your favourite place. Remember all the details: the smells, the sights, the sounds.
How did it make you feel inside? Be there again in your mind. Relish it, revel
in it, enjoy that feeling now.
I really hope that this combination of getting your body moving, relaxing and remembering a happy time will help you through your day.
